Write an argument with a thesis statement, a fairly acknowledged opposing claim, sourced evidence and a conclusion that follows

Learning goal: Write arguments to support claims with clear reasons and relevant evidence. Establish a thesis statement to present an argument; introduce your claim, acknowledge alternate or opposing claims and organize the reasons and evidence logically; support the claim with logical reasoning and relevant evidence from accurate, credible sources while demonstrating an understanding of the topic; use words, phrases and clauses to create cohesion and clarify the relationships among claim, reasons and evidence; establish and maintain a formal style; and provide a concluding statement or section that follows from and supports the argument presented.

The scenario this unit uses. Fernbrook Middle School is invented, and so is everything about it. Behind the school runs Miller Run, a small creek, and beside the creek lies the lower field, which physical education classes use three periods a day and the fall soccer team uses for ten weeks. Last school year the lower field was closed for nine days because of standing water after storms. Two proposals compete to fix it. Proposal A is a drain and pipe: a buried drain under the field carrying water straight into the creek, estimated at 11,200 dollars, installed in two weeks over the summer, with an immediate effect. Proposal B is planting: a strip of native trees and shrubs along 120 meters of the creek bank, plus a rain garden of 40 square meters beside the paved bus loop, estimated at 6,900 dollars with volunteer planting labor, and taking two to three growing seasons to reach full effect. The simulated sources are: a facilities memo (12,000 dollars is available for one project; the two estimates above; nine closure days last year); a student survey (158 of 340 seventh graders responded; 91 preferred planting, 49 preferred the drain, 18 had no preference); a letter from the physical education coach (three classes use the field daily, so nine closure days cost 27 class periods, during which classes doubled up in the gym); a letter from the county soil and water office (a planted bank and rain garden slow water and let it soak in, but take two to three seasons to establish); and a log from a neighboring invented school, Cedar Bend, which piped its creek (year one, the field stayed dry; year two, two downstream homeowners complained of faster water; year three, the pipe outlet needed 1,800 dollars of repair after a storm). None of this describes a real school. Either proposal can be argued well from it.

A thesis statement presents the argument. An argument supports a claim that a reasonable reader could dispute. The thesis statement is the sentence that presents that claim so the reader knows, from the start, what the writer will try to show. "The lower field floods a lot" is not a thesis; nobody disputes it, and it takes no side. "Fernbrook should choose the planting proposal because it costs less, keeps money in reserve for repairs and does not push the water onto someone else" is a thesis: it takes a side and it presents the reasons that will organize the argument. Establish the thesis early, normally at the end of the first paragraph, and keep it to one sentence that a reader could copy out and argue against.

Introduce the claim, acknowledge alternate or opposing claims, and organize logically. A grade 7 argument introduces its claim and then does something students often skip: it acknowledges that other people claim something else. To acknowledge an opposing claim is to state it fairly, in words its supporters would accept. The standard requires that much. This lesson asks for one step more, an answer to the claim, because an objection stated and left standing weakens the essay. "Some people want the drain because they do not like plants" is not a fair statement; nobody holds that view. "Supporters of the drain point out that it works the summer it is installed, while a planted bank needs two or three seasons" is fair, and it is also harder to answer, which is exactly why answering it persuades. Organizing the reasons and evidence logically means deciding on an order and keeping to it. One sound plan: introduction ending in the thesis; the opposing claim acknowledged and answered; reason one with its evidence and explanation; reason two; reason three; conclusion. Another sound plan saves the opposing claim for just before the conclusion. What is not sound is a paragraph that starts three reasons and finishes none, or a paragraph that restates the thesis and calls that a reason.

Support the claim with logical reasoning and relevant evidence from accurate, credible sources. A reason is a general statement of why the claim holds: "planting costs less." Evidence is the specific, checkable information behind the reason: "the facilities memo estimates 6,900 dollars for planting and 11,200 for the drain." Logical reasoning is the sentence that joins them and says why the difference matters: "Because the budget is 12,000 dollars, the drain would use nearly all of it, while planting would leave 5,100 dollars in reserve for repairs of the kind Cedar Bend needed." Evidence must be relevant: that the creek is named Miller Run is true and irrelevant to which proposal is better. Sources must be accurate and credible: the coach's letter is credible about class periods because the coach counted them; the student survey is credible for what it measured, but a writer who understands the topic states its limit. Only 158 of 340 seventh graders responded, and they chose to respond, so the 58 percent who preferred planting describes the responders, not the grade. Demonstrating an understanding of the topic means using each piece of evidence for what it can show and no more.

Use words, phrases and clauses to create cohesion and clarify relationships. Cohesion is the quality of a text whose parts visibly connect. Words such as however, therefore and also, phrases such as for that reason and a second reason is, and whole clauses such as although the drain works at once clarify how a claim, a reason and a piece of evidence relate. Clauses do the most work: "Although the drain works at once, it would leave the school little room for repairs, because its 11,200-dollar estimate uses all but 800 dollars of the 12,000 available" holds a concession, a claim and a reason in one sentence, with the relationship among them stated. A connecting word cannot manufacture logic that is not there. "Cedar Bend had complaints; therefore the drain is dangerous" is still a leap, and a careful reader sees it.

Establish and maintain a formal style. Formal style means precise nouns instead of vague ones (respondents, not people; the estimate, not the price thing), no slang (kids, tons of, way better), no intensifiers standing in for evidence (obviously, everyone knows, clearly) and a respectful tone toward the other side. Formal does not mean long-winded. "Nine days of closure cost 27 class periods" is formal and short. Maintaining the style means it holds to the last sentence; an essay that turns casual in its conclusion loses the reader's trust exactly where it needs it.

Provide a concluding statement or section that follows from and supports the argument. The conclusion restates the position in light of what has been shown and may draw out one implication. It does not add a proposal the essay never argued, and it does not apologize ("but that is just my opinion").

Original model argument — first draft (kept as it was written, for revision).

Fernbrook should plant trees by the creek because it is the best idea. Everyone wants it. The survey proves students want planting, since 58% picked it. Also it is cheaper, which is good.

The drain works right away, but so what. Cedar Bend did a pipe and it was a disaster. So a drain will obviously be a disaster here too.

Trees are also really nice to look at, and kids could hang out under them, and birds would come. Plus the rain garden would have flowers.

In conclusion, planting is clearly the winner, and the school should also get new soccer goals.

What is wrong with it. The thesis ("the best idea") presents no reasons. "Everyone wants it" is contradicted by the writer's own source: 158 of 340 responded, and 49 of them chose the drain. The opposing claim is waved away ("so what") instead of acknowledged. The Cedar Bend log does not say the pipe was a disaster; it says the field stayed dry, that two homeowners complained of faster water and that the outlet needed 1,800 dollars of repair, which is a narrower and more useful point. The style is informal ("kids", "hang out", "obviously"). The paragraph about birds and flowers has no source and no reasoning. The conclusion adds soccer goals the essay never argued for.

Original model argument — revised draft.

Fernbrook Middle School should choose the planting proposal for the lower field rather than the drain and pipe, because planting costs less and so leaves money in reserve for repairs, keeps more of the water on our own ground instead of sending it faster to the neighbors downstream, and is the choice of most students who answered the survey.

Supporters of the drain make a fair point, and it deserves to be stated plainly. The drain works the summer it is installed, while the county soil and water office says a planted bank and rain garden take two to three growing seasons to establish. During those seasons the field could still close, and the coach's letter shows what each closure costs: three classes a day, doubled up in the gym. That delay is the strongest reason to choose the drain, and this essay does not pretend it away.

However, cost changes the picture. The facilities memo sets the budget at 12,000 dollars for one project and estimates the drain at 11,200 and planting at 6,900. The drain would use nearly all of the money; planting would leave 5,100 dollars in reserve. That reserve matters because of what happened at Cedar Bend. In its third year, that school's pipe outlet needed 1,800 dollars of repair after a storm. A school that spends 11,200 of 12,000 dollars has no way to pay for a repair like that.

A second reason is where the water goes. A drain and pipe carries water off the field and into the creek faster than the ground would release it. In Cedar Bend's second year, two downstream homeowners complained of faster water. Planting does the opposite: according to the soil and water office, a planted bank and a rain garden slow water and let it soak in. The field should flood less often because less water arrives at once, not because the water is passed along.

Finally, the students who answered the survey prefer planting. Of the 158 seventh graders who responded, 91, or 58 percent, chose planting, 49 chose the drain and 18 had no preference. That survey has a limit: only 158 of 340 students responded, and they chose to take part, so the figure describes those who answered, not the whole grade. Even with that limit, it is the only measure of student opinion the school has, and it points one way.

Therefore Fernbrook should plant the bank and build the rain garden. The drain is faster, but planting costs less, keeps a reserve for repairs and solves the problem without moving it downstream. If the field closes during the two or three seasons the plants need, the reserve could help rent a nearby park field for those days, if one is available at a cost the reserve covers, which is a use of the 5,100 dollars the drain would not leave.

Reading the revision. The thesis presents three reasons (the lower cost and the reserve it leaves, where the water goes, and what the surveyed students prefer), and the body paragraphs follow that order. The opposing claim is acknowledged at its strongest, with its own evidence from the coach's letter, before it is answered. Every number comes from a named simulated source, and the survey's limit is stated by the writer. However, a second reason, finally and therefore mark how each paragraph relates to the last, and the clause "because less water arrives at once, not because the water is passed along" states a relationship the first draft left the reader to guess. The conclusion's sentence about renting a park field is not a new proposal; it follows from the reserve the essay has already established and supports the case for planting; its "if" admits that the field and its cost still have to be confirmed.

Worked acknowledgement of an opposing claim: Draft sentence: "The drain works right away, but so what." The first clause is true; the second refuses to answer it. Revision: "Supporters of the drain point out that it works the summer it is installed, while a planted bank takes two to three growing seasons; during that time the field could close again and, as the coach's letter shows, each closure day costs three class periods." The revision states the opposing claim in its supporters' terms, attaches its evidence and names its cost. Only after that can the essay answer it, and the answer will be believed because the objection was taken seriously.

Worked reason, evidence and reasoning: Reason: planting leaves money in reserve. Evidence: budget 12,000 dollars; drain estimate 11,200; planting estimate 6,900. Reasoning: 12,000 minus 11,200 is 800 dollars left after the drain; 12,000 minus 6,900 is 5,100 dollars left after planting; Cedar Bend's repair cost 1,800 dollars, which is more than 800 and less than 5,100, so only the planting choice could absorb a repair of that size. The reasoning sentence does the arithmetic and then says why the comparison matters. Without it the reader has three numbers and no argument.

Worked cohesion repair: Draft: "Cedar Bend got complaints. The pipe moved water faster. Planting slows water." Three true sentences, no visible connection. Revision: "Because a pipe carries water into the creek faster than the ground would release it, Cedar Bend's downstream neighbors complained of faster water; planting, by contrast, slows the water and lets it soak in." The because clause gives the cause, the main clause gives the result and by contrast signals that the next idea is the opposite case. The relationships are now on the page.

Worked conclusion check: "Therefore the school should plant the bank and also buy new soccer goals" fails because the goals were never argued. "Therefore the school should plant the bank; if the field closes while the plants establish, the 5,100-dollar reserve could help rent a nearby park field, if one is available at a cost the reserve covers" follows from the reserve paragraph and supports the claim. A conclusion may draw out an implication of what the essay showed; it may not add a position the essay did not earn.

Planning record: Choose the drain, the planting proposal or a defined combination (for example, the rain garden alone plus a smaller drain). Write your thesis in one sentence that presents at least two reasons. Then complete a four-column plan: reason, exact evidence with its simulated source, the reasoning sentence that connects them and the limit of that evidence. In a separate row, write the opposing claim at its strongest and the evidence its supporters would cite. Exchange plans with a partner whose job is to find one piece of evidence you have used beyond what it can show and one connection you have left for the reader to guess.

Independent performance: Write a 400-word argument addressed to Fernbrook's field committee. Success criteria: a thesis statement that presents the argument and its reasons; the opposing claim acknowledged fairly, with its evidence, before it is answered; at least two reasons, each with relevant evidence from a named simulated source and a reasoning sentence; the student survey, if used, reported with its 158-of-340 limit; words, phrases and clauses that make the relationships among claim, reasons and evidence explicit; a formal style from first sentence to last, with no slang and no intensifier in place of evidence; and a concluding section that follows from the argument and adds no new proposal. Submit the first draft, the revised draft and three sentences naming what changed and why.